A prayer of many

Lord I am yours. There is no illusion capable of changing reality and there's no reality within the illusion. You are Real. I too am Real but dressed with clouds of fog. Close, yet so far. Within, yet so separate. Remind me oh Lord for you are not part of the dream. Remind me of You. Remind me of Reality. I am willing to wake up, willing to turn my beloved and my possession to dust as You wake me from my dream into Reality. You are all that's True. Forever. Impossible to count and measure. It.  All. Infinite. Love. My maker. I am worthy of Your love and love my worthiness. Thank you, my Lord, for loving me so much to send me a dream. Such trust. Such love. Oh Lord!

I have always hated You. It was never the wicked whom I hated, the one inflicting pain, shredding minds and bodies to pieces, the one I really hated was You. It was not the oppressor, giver of separation, the illness, the darkness or hate, it was always You to whom I turned to send bullets, arrows and knives of hate. I wanted You to stop.  I wanted You to leave me alone. For I always knew it was You. You hid within me at birth.  And I knew. And I hated you for everything I lived.  Every cut, bruise, loss, assault, for every illness and loneliness, incomprehension and difference...  I hated You. For You are all there is. Lord, You are all there is and I always knew You wanted me to taste every bit of darkness, bring it to the light.  Confront demons, blood of my own blood, sons and daughters of my womb.  I hated You while praying You. I hated You while I praising Your name. I hated You to the extreme of my perception while being the furthest fromYou. And the...

Lord, I am naked. You took all my clothes off and burned them. Grant me the heart of David. Lord, I am hungry. You took all my food away as it was rotten. Grant me the heart of David Lord. For I did not move. I kneel and thank You and pray You and sing Your Name from the top of my lungs. Grant me the heart of David oh Lord  Clothe me with your Mercy and feed me with your Wisdom and I shall live forever in Your Palace. I kneel and lower my head so my eyes won't see the wicked whispers of forbidden desires. Grant me the heart of David so my eyes and heart and mind will only see You, my Lord, my Savior, my King.